Passing of Joseph B. Wirthlin

Elder Joseph B. Wirthlin, a member of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles, passed away on Monday evening at the age of 91. When he passed I thought about my experience with understanding him as a person and as a special witness of Christ. He was not a very dynamic speaker during the years that I was actually attentive to his messages. I don't know if it was always the case for him, but he seemed to speak in somewhat of a monotone voice and was, for me, at times, difficult to listen to. Due to that experience, I made the incorrect assumption that the content of his message matched his delivery. But while I was on my mission and could only read his messages, I quickly learned otherwise... and repented :^). In fact, his messages have been some of the most influential for me over the years. He was related to the late President Gordon B. Hinckley as their grandmother's were half-sisters (they share the same middle name - Bitner). A co-worker of mine is related to the Bitner line and so he has been at family reunions with Elder Wirthlin and President Hinckley. He mentioned to me recently that "Uncle Joe" was one of the kindest men he had ever met and that at these reunions he would frequently be found with a member of the family who "didn't fit in" or was maybe on the outskirts of the mainstream family values. This seemed to fit my image of him. I have always appreciated his humor and the stories he shared.

1. Another lesson I learned on the football field was at the bottom of a pile of 10 other players. It was the Rocky Mountain Conference championship game, and the play called for me to run the ball up the middle to score the go-ahead touchdown. I took the handoff and plunged into the line. I knew I was close to the goal line, but I didn’t know how close. Although I was pinned at the bottom of the pile, I reached my fingers forward a couple of inches and I could feel it. The goal line was two inches away.
At that moment I was tempted to push the ball forward. I could have done it. And when the refs finally pulled the players off the pile, I would have been a hero. No one would have ever known.
I had dreamed of this moment from the time I was a boy. And it was right there within my reach. But then I remembered the words of my mother. “Joseph,” she had often said to me, “do what is right, no matter the consequence. Do what is right and things will turn out OK.”
I wanted so desperately to score that touchdown. But more than being a hero in the eyes of my friends, I wanted to be a hero in the eyes of my mother. And so I left the ball where it was—two inches from the goal line.
I didn’t know it at the time, but this was a defining experience. Had I moved the ball, I could have been a champion for a moment, but the reward of temporary glory would have carried with it too steep and too lasting a price. It would have engraved upon my conscience a scar that would have stayed with me the remainder of my life. I knew I must do what is right.
The Light of Christ helps us to discern right from wrong. When we allow temptations to drown out the still voice of our conscience—that is when decisions become difficult. [The link to the full talk is here]

2. I remember when one of our daughters went on a blind date. She was all dressed up and waiting for her date to arrive when the doorbell rang. In walked a man who seemed a little old, but she tried to be polite. She introduced him to me and my wife and the other children; then she put on her coat and went out the door. We watched as she got into the car, but the car didn’t move. Eventually our daughter got out of the car and, red faced, ran back into the house. The man that she thought was her blind date had actually come to pick up another of our daughters who had agreed to be a babysitter for him and his wife.
We all had a good laugh over that. In fact, we couldn’t stop laughing. Later, when our daughter’s real blind date showed up, I couldn’t come out to meet him because I was still in the kitchen laughing. Now I realize that our daughter could have felt humiliated and embarrassed. But she laughed with us, and as a result, we still laugh about it today.
The next time you’re tempted to groan, you might try to laugh instead. It will extend your life and make the lives of all those around you more enjoyable. [The link to the full talk is here]

Anyway, as many of these great men move through my life, I'm grateful for their distant, yet real impact on who I am as a person, a husband and a father. I'm glad that Elder Wirthlin has reunited with his wife.